Saturday, April 6, 2013
Dancing My Heart Awake
Choosing to always listen to my heart has been a challenge. I trust my intuition (when I allow myself listen to it) and feel where it arises in my body (usually my heart), yet don’t always trust that I need to follow through on it or manifest it. In the last few years however, I'm learning to dance my heart awake.
Like starting to become a Kundalini Dance facilitator. I have dreamed of doing this since early 2010, when I first looked at the training online, yet always thought ‘one day’... ‘when the time is right’...then in early 2012 I was presented with an opportunity to do a 7 day retreat in Hawaii. Awesome I thought, I have 7 months to save for that, no problem, and it’s going to be amazing. But it didn’t seem to organize itself and was instead replaced with the same retreat only a ferry ride away from Vancouver. Even more perfect! Yet again, 1 month before the experience, it was again cancelled and I was once again feeling wow, must not be meant to be, but when will it?? So then I start to plan to go to Costa Rica for May 2013, yet also hearing from my weekly KD facilitator that it may not be happening....so there I was again, dreaming and searching in my soul when I could delve into this practice and follow my dream... For some reason I never had, not never allowed myself to see January 2013 in Australia in my minds eye....now fast forward time and space after my heart finally pushed my mind out of the way and within a few days I had registered for the program, booked my flights and was on my way to Australia within 3 weeks! Everything just fell into place as I let myself and my heart be drawn to what it loves.
For me, Kundalini Dance is an experience where I am soulfully dancing...dancing the pureness of my soul. Feeling myself as energy, as emotion, as authentic expression. Feeling completely myself, where there is no judgement, no expectations and no self imposed constraints. When I dance I feel whole, in union with myself, with the earth, with Great Spirit. Letting Shakti earth energy ignite and rise up my central channel, up to my heart center where I can divinely express and be in my essence, then up to Shiva pure sky source where unity and oneness transmutes anything that is no longer serving me. Then comes the divine downpour in which Shiva and Shakti marry and merge in my body to create complete ecstasy, like a thousand rainbow bubbles are floating through my body, like a million fireflies are igniting joy with every beat of its wings. Like an infinite amount of love-atoms are vibrating pure bliss.
That is why I dance...for those blissful moments. For the ecstacy.
To merge and marry the divine feminine with the divine masculine in which my body can feel, heal, pray, release, experience and transform.
Dancing my heart awake has been a process of evolution, of patient listening, of breath by breath embodiment. Each day is an opportunity to practice heart-centered listening. To feel my heart push or pull, to feel it open up or contract. My body has a wisdom that is so in-tune and expressive that I can learn an infinite amount of clarity from it...I can release its medicine so I can continue to transform, heal and embrace myself in each moment more fully.
Dancing my heart awake has introduced me to myself.